Dave Barry

Peder Severin Krøyer [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons

"If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be 'meetings.'"

Chuck Palahniuk

"The best thing about getting a flu shot is that you never again need to wash your hands. That's how I see it."

E.B. White

"It is not often that someone comes along who is a true friend and a good writer."

Aeschylus

By Ian Furst via Wikimedia Commons

"There is no avoidance in delay."

James Jones

By The Conmunity - Pop Culture Geek from Los Angeles, CA, USA via Wikimedia Commons

"It is the knowledge of the unendingness and of the repetitious uselessness, the do it up so it can be done again, that makes Fatigue fatigue."

George Bernard Shaw

"Progress is impossible without change, and those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything."

John Steinbeck

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"It is a common experience that a problem difficult at night is resolved in the morning after the committee of sleep has worked on it."

Marie Kondo

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"At their core, the things we really like do not change over time. Putting your house in order is a great way to discover what they are."

Phillip Pullman

"After nourishment, shelter and companionship, stories are the thing we need most in the world."

H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

"When facing a difficult task, act as though it is impossible to fail. If you are going after Moby Dick, take along the tartar sauce."

Kristin Armstrong

"Typically creative people are usually not clock-slaves or list-makers, so the idea of enforcing goals and deadlines can be somewhat daunting."

Mark Twain

"Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured."

Erma Bombeck

By Mark Miller via Wikimedia Commons

"Thanksgiving dinners take eighteen hours to prepare. They are consumed in twelve minutes. Half-times are twelve minutes. This is not coincidence."

Dwight Schrute

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"Babies are one of my many areas of expertise. Growing up, I performed my own circumcision."

Agatha Christie

"One of the luckiest things that can happen to you in life, I think, is to have a happy childhood."

Paul Cezanne

By nist6dh (The Bait) via Wikimedia Commons

"The day is coming when a single carrot, freshly observed, will set off a revolution."

Tom Hodgkinson

"Being lazy does not mean that you do not create. In fact, lying around doing nothing is an important, nay crucial, part of the creative process. It is meaningless bustle that actually gets in the way of productivity. All we are really saying is, give peace a chance."

Anne Lamott

"Toddlers can make you feel as if you have violated some archaic law in their personal [bible] and you should die, infidel."

Ogden Nash

By Mk2010 via Wikimedia Commons

"A family is a unit composed not only of children, but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold."

Henning Mankell

Photo Courtesy of Moondyne

"Many words will be written on the wind and the sand, or end up in some obscure digital vault. But the storytelling will go on until the last human being stops listening. Then we can send the great chronicle of humanity out into the endless universe."

Plato

"Man never legislates, but destinies and accidents, happening in all sorts of ways, legislate in all sorts of ways."

Mark Twain

"Honest poverty is a gem that even a king might be proud to call his own, but I wish to sell out."

Martha Beck

By KHarold via Wikimedia Commons

"Fact: From quitting smoking to skiing, we succeed to the degree we try, fail, and learn. Studies show that people who worry about mistakes shut down, but those who are relaxed about doing badly soon learn to do well. Success is built on failure."

bell hooks

By M. G. Loppé [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons

"There is no life to be found in violence. Every act of violence brings us closer to death. Whether it's the mundane violence we do to our bodies by overeating toxic food or drink or the extreme violence of child abuse, domestic warfare, life-threatening poverty, addiction, or state terrorism."

F. Scott Fitzgerald

"All good writing is swimming under water and holding your breath."

Jane Austen

"What strange creatures brothers are!"

Ernest Hemingway

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"It's none of their business that you have to learn to write. Let them think you were born that way."

Stephen King

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"You want to remember that while you're judging the book, the book is also judging you."

Barbara de Angelis

Image courtesy of Uoaei1

"Women need real moments of solitude and self-reflection to balance out how much of ourselves we give away."

Terry Pratchett

"'I meant,' said Ipslore bitterly, 'what is there in this world that truly makes living worthwhile?'

Death thought about it.

CATS, he said eventually. CATS ARE NICE."

Paul Simon

"Losing love is like a window to your heart. Everybody sees you're blown apart. Everybody sees the wind blow."

George MacDonald

"It is our best work that G-d wants, not the dregs of our exhaustion. I think he must prefer quality over quantity."

The Incomparable Joan Rivers

"I hate housework! You make the beds, you do the dishes, and six months later you have to start all over again."

Winston Churchill

"To improve is to change; to be perfect is to change often."

Photo (c)2006 Derek Ramsey (http://www.gnu.org/licenses/old-licenses/fdl-1.2.html) via Wikimedia Commons